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Wat je moet weten over het wensenboekje

Wensenboekje Barendrecht

Waarschijnlijk probeer je er niet al te vaak bij stil te staan. Maar één ding is zeker: vroeg of laat gaan we allemaal dood. Sommige mensen weten dat zij niet meer lang hebben, voor anderen speelt doodgaan (bijna) geen rol in het leven. Wel geldt voor bijna iedereen hetzelfde: praten over de dood, en de mogelijkheden en wensen daaromheen, is lastig. Waarom is het eigenlijk zo belangrijk? Wat moet je precies allemaal bespreken? En hoe kun je dat gesprek nou het beste aanpakken?

Gissen en aannames doen

Elisa (38) vertelt: ‘Tijdens het regelen van de uitvaart van mijn oom, merkten we als familie dat het niet gemakkelijk was om bepaalde keuzes omtrent zijn afscheid te maken. Mijn oom had niets vast laten leggen omtrent zijn afscheidswensen, en ook met zijn vrouw had hij deze nooit willen bespreken. Begrijpelijk: praten over je eigen dood kan confronterend zijn. Maar nu bleef het wel bij gissen en aannames doen. Hoewel de dienst uiteindelijk wel erg mooi was, bleef het voor ons wel de vraag of hij bij zou zijn geweest met bijvoorbeeld de muziek en de locatie die wij hadden uitgekozen.’

Online wensenboekje

‘Ik had besloten dat ik meer duidelijkheid voor mijn dierbaren wilde creëren voor als het zover is. Op internet las ik over het online wensenboekje. Zoals ik al merkte bij de uitvaart van mijn oom, zijn er veel aspecten waar je over na kunt denken – van de kist tot koffietafel. Het wensenboekje gaf me een goede houvast om al deze aspecten in kaart te brengen. Wat mij verraste, was dat er zoveel mogelijkheden waren. Van nature ben ik een positief, opgeruimd persoon. Het viel mij alles mee dat een afscheid ook heel luchtig kan worden aangekleed. Dat je ook kunt kiezen voor locaties als een kroeg bijvoorbeeld, en voor vrolijke dancemuziek.’

Even onwennig

‘Ook was het fijn om de wensen later ook met mijn dierbaren te bespreken. Natuurlijk was het onwennig om het onderwerp zo ineens op tafel te gooien. Het wensenboekje was een goede leidraad: hierin werden de onderwerpen één voor één uitgelicht. Maar toen we eenmaal aan de gang waren, merkte ik dat het goed was dat ik de dood bespreekbaar had gemaakt. Iedereen vond het fijn om meer duidelijkheid te hebben. Zij durfden nu ook meer na te denken over hun eigen afscheid. Bovendien merkte ik dat mijn dierbaren mij goed kenden. Over dingen waar ik nog wat twijfels had, wisten zij me goede raad en inspiratie te geven. Het gesprek was helemaal niet zwaar. Het was goed.’

Maak de dood bespreekbaar

Zoals al uit het verhaal van Elisa blijkt, is dat mensen weinig stil staan bij de vraag hoe ze hun wensen omtrent hun afscheid willen vormgeven. Welke keuzes en mogelijkheden heb je, en vooral: hoe maak je deze duidelijk aan je dierbaren? Op de dood heerst altijd nog een taboe. Maar wanneer je nadenkt over je eigen afscheid, dan verhoog je de kans dat je eigen afscheid verloopt zoals jij dat graag wilt. Misschien vind je het fijn om eens in gesprek met mij te gaan. Als uitvaartbegeleider is praten over de dood ‘doodgewoon’. Ik kan met je meedenken, en je verschillende opties aanreiken waarvan je misschien niet eens wist dat ze bestonden. Er is meer mogelijk dan je denkt! Ook maak ik het kostenplaatje inzichtelijk voor je.

Gespreksstarter

Het is goed dat je over je eigen wensen omtrent het afscheid nadenkt. Maar nu is het tijd voor de volgende stap: deze bespreekbaar maken met je dierbaren. Het wensenboekje is een handig instrument om het gesprek over de dood en de wensen daaromheen te starten. Stap voor stap worden jij – en je dierbaren – door alle aspecten van het afscheid geleid. Hierbij kun je je wensen zo vormgeven zoals jij dat graag wilt. Het kan natuurlijk ook zijn dat je geen duidelijke mening hebt over dingen als de koffietafel en de bloemen. Ook dit kun je met je dierbaren bespreken. Wie weet kunnen zij met je meedenken en je tot nieuwe inzichten laten komen. Samen maken jullie dan de keuze die het beste bij jou past.

Dynamisch

Door de jaren heen kunnen je smaak en je wensen natuurlijk veranderen. Net zoals mensen dynamisch zijn, is het wensenboekje ook dynamisch: je kunt het gemakkelijk weer aanpassen. Alles wat je hebt opgeschreven, wordt online opgeslagen. Ook bij het invullen van het wensenboekje kan ik je eventueel helpen. In een laagdrempelig voorbesprekingsgesprek denk ik graag met je mee. Stuur me gerust een mailtje of bel me even, dan kunnen we een afspraak inplannen.

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  34. Where to study music in the UK?
    Studying abroad is a complex and expensive business: the cost of a year can vary from hundreds of thousands to one and a half million rubles per year. However, there are many grants and scholarships available, some of them covering up to 100% of the tuition costs. You can learn about the subtleties of preparing a portfolio for admission and receiving scholarships at the exhibition of British education “Study UK: Discover You”. We advise you on which educational institutions you should pay attention to.

    BIMM (British & Irish Modern Music Institute)
    The music industry in miniature .Britain’s most prestigious school of contemporary music. It teaches not only how to play a musical instrument well, but also how to interact with the industry. Among the directions — vocals, playing instruments, music business, production and songwriting (it is taught, for a moment, vocalist Lamb).

    On the territory of the Institute there are several rehearsal bases and small studios: young musicians gather groups, record demos and organize concerts without leaving the walls of their native University, and student journalists publish LDN magazine, where they talk about their colleagues and interview masters from big show business. Senior colleagues (ranging from Chuck D to Brian may) also visit students, telling them about the intricacies of their work and leaving Souvenirs: in one of the halls, for example, you can admire an autographed Niall Rogers guitar. In General, there is a whole model of the music industry-and the model is quite working. As a result, bimm alumni include George Ezra, Tom Odell, Izzy Bizu, and the Cure drummer Jason Cooper. Royal Academy of Music. The oldest Conservatory in the United Kingdom, under the personal patronage of Her Majesty, will celebrate its bicentenary in 2022. The list of graduates and alumni is no less impressive: among others, Annie Lennox from Eurythmics and Elton John studied here (for authenticity, a couple of scenes of “Rocketman” were filmed in the Royal Academy

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  36. What Red Bull Music Academy was for musicians and why we will miss it
    What is the RBMA?
    International music residency for artists, producers and DJs, which was sponsored by Red Bull, and the musical and organizational part was handled by yadastar from Cologne. A creative residence is something similar to a children’s camp for adults: participants gather in one place, live together, engage in creativity and make joint projects.

    In addition to the creative residency, RBMA is also a huge archive of video lectures from well-known producers, sound engineers and musicians: all these lectures were held live during the residency.RBMA started working in 1998 in Berlin. At that time, the tumultuous nineties and euphoria that came after the fall of the Berlin wall were already fading, and people who came to Berlin for inspiration either left or lost their enthusiasm.
    “We were 23 years old,” says Torsten Schmidt and Mani ameri, the founders of Yadastar, which founded the residency in collaboration with Red Bull, ” and we really missed the opportunity to learn music: it was difficult to exchange experiences, all like — minded people seemed to be scattered and confused all over the world, pathetic sound engineering courses and music colleges did not provide a single gram of valuable or even relevant information. When Red Bull asked what kind of project they could do with us in the music field, the idea was obvious — it would be cool to bring together musicians of different styles and cultures and give them the opportunity to learn from each other.”

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  37. Learn several foreign languages

    It’s nice to come to Italy and say “Buongiorno!” passing waiter. And then catch the admiring glances of those with whom you came. Is not it? But it has long been known that learning foreign languages contributes to the development of a good memory. It’s also very interesting! So why not take advantage of this?

    These are effective methods for training memory. But there is also something interesting. Memory is inextricably linked to proper and good brain function. This means that stimulating its work allows you to improve memory:

    It has been proven that regular sports activities increase brain activity and improve memory;
    No to gray days! It is well remembered that that does not fit into the framework of everyday life. Try to change the environment, add bright colors, go to the store on a new path … It is not necessary to radically change your life. Just add something new to your daily routine, and your brain will work with renewed vigor;
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    This is just a small part of the effective techniques for developing memory. But simple reading will not work. Apply these techniques. Remember, only 50% of the result depends on the doctor, and the remaining 50% on the patient. Without working on yourself, you will never reach the top.
    Figure 1. Sample structure of coursework
    The above structure can only serve as a guide. When giving the assignment to write a term paper, the teacher usually shows a sample of drawing up a plan, explains which sections should be contained in it.
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    The introduction is what is always read. If the main part of the commission (and even the leader, if he is not very conscientious) can skim through, then the first pages of the text will certainly receive close attention. As the title implies, this section serves to introduce readers to the course of the matter, to briefly describe the research. The introduction consists of typical parts:
    Relevance of the topic. You need to explain why you chose this particular topic, why it should be considered. The arguments presented depend significantly on the direction of the research – it can be either the novelty of the topic (“in connection with active changes in this area”), or its controversial nature (when one large scientific school expresses one opinion, and another – another), or practical significance. For historical topics, it is necessary to establish a connection with the present, to trace what the events of the past are affecting now, to draw parallels.
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